Precious Memories in the Spirit of Christmas

By Linda Sechrist

In the spirit of Christmas, I find myself returning to the earliest memory of sensing that Consciousness was awakening within me. It was 1994, and I was journaling—simply writing a handwritten account of my day—when suddenly the word LIFE appeared on the page, printed in large capital letters. I hadn’t consciously written it.

I remember staring at it for a long time, struck by how odd it looked amid my flowing cursive, how boldly it stood out as if placed there with intention. I felt mystified, almost as though a force other than myself had taken hold of my hand, trying to get my attention. But what was the message? And why? I carried those questions with me for months. Even now, thirty-two years later, the memory of that single printed word remains vivid—like a photo tucked into a scrapbook of my soul.

The previous year, 1993, had been one of profound upheaval. I had lost my home and job as a result of the Savings & Loan scandal in New England. My seven-year love relationship had ended, my daughter had taken a job at sea, and I was wrestling with a painful mother-daughter dynamic. In the span of months, I moved from Massachusetts to Pennsylvania and then to Ohio. It felt as if I’d been struck by the Cosmic 2x4 while simultaneously experiencing the collapse of my ego. I was afraid to fall asleep, convinced I might simply disappear—a terrifying thought I could neither shake nor explain. All of it together ushered me straight into what is often called the Dark Night of the Soul.

In the midst of so much loss, I somehow knew I needed to create something positive to keep myself afloat. I became involved with one of the first Hospice chapters in Massachusetts and stepped into leadership roles within the Boston Cursillo community—a natural extension of the transformative retreat I had attended in 1991. Cursillo gathers people into small community, united in Christ, to support one another in growth and grace.

Wanting to better understand the journey unfolding inside me, I bought The Essene Book of Days in 1994—a seasonal journal, calendar, and spiritual guide. Looking through it now, I notice that the words LIFE, LIVING, and LOVE are scattered throughout its pages. My Christian background—and my experience with Cursillo—had taught me to think of Christ as a Messiah, who was once human. I had never considered that Christ could also be an energy capable of awakening within me and transforming my life from the inside out.

The Essene journal explained that in ancient times, the term Missiayah did not refer to a person but to an energy field—an expanded consciousness capable of infusing the world, to which human consciousness could rise and respond every two thousand years.

The most startling realization came when I understood that the word LIFE, which had appeared in my journaling months earlier, marked the first stirrings of Christ Consciousness awakening within me—an energy beginning to live as me, gently dissolving layers of my conditioning day by day.

Deeper wisdom later revealed to me that enlightenment—the awakening of Consciousness, our true essence—is a process of unlearning. The mind cannot attain enlightenment; it can only happen in the heart, the seat of Consciousness, where truth is felt, not analyzed.

The call of our essential nature is often drowned out by the noise of the world, which is why it’s so difficult to hear. I eventually discovered that sometimes the message must appear right—or even write—in front of me in order to finally capture my attention.